Saturday, April 20, 2013

Life's a Pitch



In life you will meet a whole lot of bitches in the process of making a whole lot of pitches. A bitch will generally be anyone, male or female, who demands extensive foot licking before helping you out.  They are present everywhere you go. Through perseverance and shedding off of several layers of your dignity, you should eventually tilt the bitch/pitch equation to your favour and have less bitches to deal with when pitching your offer. At the present moment, it’s easy to find yourself saying stuff like, “If I was in this guy’s position, I would never treat ordinary decent people that way.” But soon, circumstances change and a dozen excuses for you to be that bitch will appear out of thin air like Presto!


As a pitcher though, you shall learn to embrace the one word that all expectant women fear: Push! You will continually push yourself to hang on to your ambitions even when the rope is clearly tearing off above your head.  And most times you will push others to buy what you are offering even when you know you’re way in over your head. Push is the name of the game and it’s much like a game of thrones: you eat dirt, at least in the beginning, until you are able to pull people towards you using your mighty status scepter. Then and only then, are you allowed to sit back and act like royalty.

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