Rule #51 We Like to Party

When it comes to rave

I don’t rave without a car

When I rave without a car, I don’t rave without a big wad of cash

When I rave with a car, I don’t rave without chics

I don’t even rave that much.

I prefer house parties.

They are easier to roll with

When I go for house parties, I go for house parties that are within a 30 minute drive from home.

Anything beyond that is pushing it.

31 minutes is pushing it

I’d go for 31 minutes if a chic was pushing it

When I am at a house party, I prefer to get hammered

It has resulted in bad decision making

But bad decisions made at a house party are better than bad decisions made during a rave

When I do get hammered at a house party it’s a lot easier to pass out without getting robbed

Or raped

But I’m not so sure about the latter

Koinange Street

This is the junction at which Koinange Street meets Kenyatta Avenue. The street inspired the name of a rock project I started in 2010 - Koinange Street Avengers.

On women

I have a girlfriend ,or at least I think I do. As an ex-boyfriend to one girl who I totally fell in love with and went out with for 8 months only to be relieved of my romantic duties ,an ex-fling to one nice chic who I almost fell in love for too (pheuks!) ,an ex-dumper to one rebound with whom I haven't quite understood to date why I was involved with in the first place ,it is quite obvious I was just in it for the lungula. And we are what modern society might term as friends with benefits and even the friends bit is even a bit overstated because for our case we hardly call each other to just talk, at least not anymore. We are more like sensual partners , that's the way I prefer to put it.

So from these many yet concisely described experiences I have undergone with nominees of the fairer sex I obviously have my self conclusive take on them. Today I touch on fact one. Feel free to pick your stones and aim.

Chics can be highly indecisive yet strangely impatient. This would be the moment at which the more affected kind with this trait shift to another blog/webpage or start a personal outrage in their minds to label me a sexist ,masochistic pig or whatever ''sophisticated'' word that comes in handy when they want to describe guys with warped views on the woman's ability. But believe it or not I personally made the comment to one chic and she calmly accepted the first bit. Take a case in point , me and my chic are walking into a shoe store. She wants to check out which shoes she's going to buy. She isn't really going to buy them right away because she doesn't have the cash but it sure would be nice if I offered to buy them for her...sure it would. So she proceeds to step two; Selection. After 20 minutes of strolling in circles we wind up at the grand divide that separates the black open flats with white flowers plus sparkly straps and the navy blue opens with a thicker sole and white flowers as well. Now, the funny bit is not that we are trying to decide between two pairs with such little difference in appearance as well as price but its the fact that we just left a supermarket before this store which had the exact pair of black open flats and she already claimed not to like them. So eventually she goes with the navy blue one after like 10 minutes of intense psycho-analytical evaluations (or so it seemed from the look on her face) and of course my very available and ready consultation. Fortunately I was not too agitated with the situation given my first girlfriend had taken me through a more gruelling but similar process at the same store once. And whats more ,she had her pal with her to compound the dilemma. It was nothing short of a time-wasting masterpiece. And still I was patient enough not to walk away unconcernedly and find a more engaging plot. Patience. That's all it takes

"Now go out there and reproduce page clicks"

"Now go out there and reproduce page clicks" I told my leapfrogged article after submitting it for publishing. Leapfrogging is what you do when your article falls short of Helium's royal writing standards. I have only made a dollar so far on Helium. I had written a masterpiece on playing the guitar but they just had to send it back to me. How much do I earn if it goes through? I have no bleeding clue! Probably another dollar... in a month. I am the proverbial scripting pauper. Despite seeking this as a serious professional endeavour, a church-mouse would laugh at my efforts on online hustling. All this content creation hogwash is sincerely draining my tenacity to stay in the game and make big. It makes me miss doing rich kids' homeworks. But then I find comfort in this here my state of lostness by watching series like Suits. Yet it is only a TV program. Suits is that series about a jobless college-education-less kid who is pretty much a nobody and a very intelligent nobody at that. He's an avid reader who consumes knowledge like a Subaru consumes fuel. For some reason he does not value the whole corporate swag profile as much as he values being an achiever. Despite both angles being quite synonymous with each other we cannot dispute the fact that being a corporate king pin isn't the only way to be an achiever. I am the kind of guys who tries to eke out success in the most concealed crevices and that is why I always relate to such characters - The rebels.

Dude on the left is pure genius